Balance between giving and receiving

Balance between giving and receiving from the perspective of family constellations:

Between partners the balance 'giving and receiving' has to be in an equilibrium. Because, when you give too much, finally your partner, who receives more, will leave you. Giving too much is a kind of humiliation of the other. The other comes in a position of debt and nobody wants this.

But there is something like 'a little more':

If you love someone and your beloved gives you something nice, you return him or her a little more of which is nice. In this way a positive spiral is created.

If someone you love, gives you something negative, you return something negative, but a little less. If you return the same or even more negativity, then the other will take revenge and you both come in a negative spiral.

If your beloved does something negative you and don't do anything or you even give him or her something positive, then there is no balance. And then you humiliate the other. Like: I am better than you.